ISSN 1409-6900 | UDK 82+7 Blesok no. 65 | volume XII | March-April, 2009
Blesok no. 65,
The Sigh of Pain that Creates Both Reality and Art
(on Goce Smilevski's novel Sigmund Freud's Sister. – Skopje: Kultura, 2007, 182 pp)
In the reception process, we all learn from each other. We are constantly borrowing eternal themes and motives, but we do not give up the wish to also tell our own story. This story of our own is built by Goce Smilevski as quite a credible story told by Sigmund Freud's sister, who never left Vienna (5). Via her, the author wisely explains the thing that is not so easily accepted: that all of our dilemmas and wonderings on our own past, on our forefathers' past, are not only a story of our origin, our roots, but also a story of the specific misconceptions of a (some) time. Adolphina Freud returns us to the time when we were able to listen only, but not tell stories, to the time when we were not even allowed to tell them. Still, she is one of the rare ones that the author Smilevski allows to take their pen, that is, their brush in their hand: The brush moved to the board and it chose the black color, then it touched the canvas, wanting to put a dot, but the dot continued into a line, and the line expanded into a surface. In the end, the black color fully covered the small canvas, as a replacement for the silence, as a proof of the ignorance how to start the painting and telling of my life, as a question why I decide to paint again, and why to tell again, and why I have chosen my past as an object of my painting and story telling (9). Her story is a collection of several stories: the one of Sarah Auerbach, the girl imprisoned in a space, immobile, tied for her bed, a girl who wants to dance ballet, who wants to know how to paint; on Gustav, who was a winner in all battles, except in the one with his mother; on his sister Clara; on Verter as a literary character whom Dolphy wants to paint; on Verter with whom she develops a real, honest friendship because she simply can talk with him about what she always wanted to talk about: and mostly about Rainer, her love to Rainer.
I do not remember if any text has caused me so much pleasure as the recent novel by Goce Smilevski. I do not remember a text that has awaken the pain in me so hard, a
1. What Gilles Deleuze stresses in his work Proust and the Signs on the novel In Search of Lost Time is also a guiding thought of Smilevski. In his novel Sigmund Freud's Sister he proves that the search for lost time, the one of the girl, woman, old woman Dolphy is a search for truth. One should stress here that this search does not result in a simple listing of memories, but it develops a story about learning, The learning is essentially based on signs, Smilevski stresses what is provocative for him at Deleuse, and learning means to observe a matter, an object, a creature, as they emit signs that should be interpreted (…) the material signs have their value only if they merge in the non-material ones – the signs of art. In this context, one can make a serious analysis of what signs are being sent to us by Adolphina Freud. See Goce Smilevski “Bodies between Textualization and Silence” in Спектар. – Скопје: Институт за македонска литература, 2007, no. 49, 127-139, a text that is an excerpt from his bigger study on Body in Milan Kundera's Novels.
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