Blesok no. 35, March-April, 2004

Selected and translated by: Elizabeta Bakovska

Ljupčo Dimitrovski


there is nothing to tell
nothing to prove
what was indeed was
so one should not seek
any meanings any games
in her or in us
or an intention to show
a new state of spirit
in images of love extasy

it was simply us
while she was with us
with a passion for some sorrow
in her eyes a distant star
much later much too late
we realised her death

as a martter of fact her
slow dying
as a yellow leaf on a dry bough
extinguishing in the air
before they fall togther
the leaf and the dry bough
in abysses in silence
with the wind of a long autumn

there are no
any meanings any games
there is nothing yet
to discover
to interpret
to rethink
what was indeed was

one should seek no more poetry
no sources
no creative challenges
it simply happened
what happened with her
what happened with us
and then the war an death
and then the game
drew us so much
that we completely forgot
the beginning
our end

rest assured
we made love
because she knew
none of us
in her sickness or her passion
she recognised herself

(as you give yourself
to your lover)

I created you to keep silent
to give yourself to everybody
when you have no time for me

your new lover
carefully studies
all of your features
as if you are a bird in her last flight
the things you can sustain
the things you can not
for he knows you can always
do more

if needed you’ll cut a piece
of your skin
to prove that
you can not be alone in bed
just to prove to him
how you can ache
without him
how sincere and hones you are
before him
if needed
you’ll cut your thumb
and your pinky and all of your fingers
aor your ear as Van Gogh
just to prove to him
how you canb stay
awake without a breath
as he studies you
as the map of the world
above your bed
from your hair to your breasts to the bottom
all the way to boredom

if needed
you’ll cut your lips
as a cold wind
you’ll enter his bones
just to prove
to your lover
that he must have you on his mind
as a street dog
searching through our night

you lit fire on your body
the fire burns the doubt
your lover
has sunk you in
that you’ll ever be
in a game with life
at peace with an offpring
as you give yourself to him
a strange rain covers you
red and green and black
you with your mouth open
dreaming of being carried
to a coast
and then slowly disappearing
in livesand with your mouth open
mute as if deserted
by any hope
as if all the force
is in your blood

nobody is capable
of being silent as much as you


if the kiss melts in restlessness
two flowers of a tired moment
let it reach you
for you hear my words
you interpret my speech
when I am silent
when I dream of you

kiss stopped before time
die out in her calm
when she wonders
why I’m long gone
for only in her thoughts
only there shall I be

pointless is
every effort she makes
that nothing happens
between us

kiss disappear
turn to stone
in her eyes
on her lips
in the rhythm and life
of her heart

let her sense
let her measure
let her discover
let her burn
all my solitudes
all her shadows
long piled inside me

(your walls)

they are so high
no sun beam
no wind of the day
that comes
can fly over them
to enter you
so you are nor the same

and you are the same for ages
when I take you
as a common word
where nobody’s past
and nobody’s future
can find
a calm moment
and present events

you are the same for ages
my poem
in a dark corner
of my consciousness
in some
hidden landscape
of my subconsciousness
a pain
you do not let me
overcome a lonely
in silence

your high
will still
once fall
some tempest
will shake
the foundations
the essence of your
before the people
who listen to you

your high walls
will fall
they will strip
they will open
before a sun beam
or a wind
so that you are not forgotten
by the day that somes
so that it does not happen
that it passes you
so that something else
will have to happen
so that it is with you
never without you
never above you
or before you

my poem
thrown as a seed
that will grow
towards the sun and the wind
to all sides
of the world
long kept quiet
long dying
in its roots
by its own
by humiliations and insults
by betrayals and mistakes

my pain
you do not let me
wake up in time
when nobody thinks of me
and when everybody thinks of me
stay with me
stay in me
stay behind me
to defend me
from disgrace
to protect me

and if you have to
and be born
with others

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